This one for you, Angry Vindictive one.

HYBRID
It's a hybrid of me-I'm a hybrid of he
You're a misfit of me-I'm a misfit of you ...in limbo
Carbon copies run blue-a reminder for you but they're only skin deep crumpled shells in a heap Marked cheap
Surrogate heads of a no-no domain
shoulders form rows to make waves again Catch the next train
When you walked through that door marked "enter if you dare" Reasoned with a friend marked "do not bend" bit on that finger marked "handle with care"
a tear soiled your cheek-a broken finger on the floor a mess in sawdust-a shop window burst..no repairs
it's a hybrid of me-I'm a hybrid of he
You're a misfit for me-I'm a misfit for you in limbo.....do you speak the lingo?
-Siouxie & the Banshees

So, today I did a mayor screw up, which hurt badly someone I cared for too much... Being the careless thoughtless bitch I am, this one has been master of disasters. I did not realize I had such an impact... I try but cannot trust so fast. Still, I did thought of you as a close friend, since I bared my soul to you easily, as if I have known you for years. From some words I can feel Hell sent towards me, and I don't deny I deserve it for lack of belief... or just becoming scared? Who knows... I don't. I just feel choked. I lost a great friend today.
So, closing the day, this Lullaby for you... Hoping it can sooze your soul in a way... If such a thing can be accomplished.

Lullaby

The lunacy will leave the day
Luminous in flight
As the moon spits out
In jagged beams another night
Wrap around this brilliant veil
Tranquil and unbroken
As you spiral down
A world of clay and taut convulsion
The dream swan spins
And cartwheel turns
Down deep within your violet side
The sun begins to rise
Skaing down its morining swords to thaw your frozen eyes
The dream swan spins
And so conceal the heart that aches and yearns
Hush awhile
Sleepless child
I'll be watching over you
-Siouxie & the Banshees

I'll be watching. I keep my promises.