Priming, birthday, and MORE dissapointments

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Holy Friday was quite busy. Primed some walls while the mage primed the ceiling. Watched Madonna’s Confessions Tour. Awesome. Breathless. The woman will always be my favorite idol, standing right next to Siouxie and Cher. Didn’t felt like going anywhere or seeing anyone… besides, no cash to spare.

Saturday… Had to get out and do some grocery shopping, the fridge was almost empty. Got the necessary evils, paint for the living room and so, back home. Watched the Grudge (American version), followed by my Ju-On (japanese version) just to compare notes… I am sorry, but Asian horror movies should NOT be translated into flimsy remakes so that Americans can understand them… It takes only a bit of cultural research to understand the imagery and the reasoning behind their stories… It goes to show how simple things have to be put so people can actually get them… Only cult psychos understand the real thing… Oh, so be it… But remakes are truly making me sick!

Sunday… My Birthday. I was born just as the rising sun dispelled the night, some 34 winters ago. Birthday celebration? I wished… I wanted to do something, but upon checking my bank account a disruption in the force had sent everything down the drain… Although I will have a forbearance until next year, the student loan people charged me this month anyway, and so I found myself in a negative number. Headache. Beyond headache.

Got a call from Coriolis congratulating me, and then a call from Groundel singing the Bday theme song. There was a small earth tremor as we spoke (the excitement of the day, seems it was felt through Mayaguez, CaboRojo and Hormigueros) So… Nothing else to do but visit auntie, who at least made a strawberry cake just for me, and a hearthy chicken “asopao” with asparagus topping and some “almojabanas”. Happy birthday to me… Barriguita llena, corazón contento.

Went with the mage to pickup Groundel, so we would go to Easter mass… Since it was after dark, the church giving service was not the one I’m used to, but we went anyway… Ugh! Talk about sacrifices… A closed place is not a place to burn incense. At the end I was left with a big headache and allergy. Plus the whole ceremony was a pompous empty thing… Well, that church is all about that… pompousity… no spirit over substance. Just like going to the cathedral, which I also despise. I rather go to the small church where I got married. That place is warm and cozy, the people are real and go because of the meaning of it all and not because of appearance, and the priest is genuinely in love with the people… You can feel it. So… Lesson learned… Try the very best to go to Fatima services, because everywhere else is just about image and no soul…

Delivered Groundel, and went home. Watched the Academy of Bards episode of Xena Season 1, and off to bed.

Monday: Had a WIC appointment… or so I thought… I didn’t realize that the date was for May, not April… So… Had the whole morning off, and went to the bank to make a small deposit that should straighten the account… sort of… Courtesy of auntie who gave me her week’s check as birthday gift. She’s a pain in the whoohoo, but she always gives so easily, and even without my asking. Shouldn’t expect any less, she’s the one who whould be called my mother. Anyway… Went home and primed a bit more. Made the mage sweat a little as he had to fix some floor holes with cement, rip out some wall border stuff, and fill up with primer some corners in the ceiling. By midday got ready in a fix, ate a quick lunch and off to work I went. So, here I am… Just as I expected… Nothing of interest going on… Should have stayed at home… Oh, well… Got a bday e-card from Kara (thanks a bunch!!! That was lovely) and from my family in Texas. May go get more “asopao” when I get off work, and to visit Groundel for a bit so the traffic goes away before I head home… Traffic annoys me too much.

Hopefully sleep will be sound, and this week will pass away quickly… Need to prime the floor before the weekend… so the walls can be painted on Saturday and the floor on Sunday morning.

Kitties feeling happy. They’ve been roaming the second floor for 3 nights in a row… Supervised outings, but it means freedom for them.

Me, feeling a bit blah with a bit sad and a bit content. Each passing year b-days get even more crappier… and life complicates things so plans are always ditched and you don’t really get to do the things you really want to do… and you don’t get the chance to gather the people you want to gather, in a same place, to celebrate in a simple way… Not even at my wedding date could that be accomplished… I wanted to be with my best friends after the ceremony, and that was not humanly possible… Raven had to go, El Calvo had to go, Groundel couldn’t stay… Coriolis, LS and Popu were the miracles of the night… Even on dates that are supposed to make an everlasting memory shit happens… But I guess that’s life. And in my case, I should be used to it… Not even once in my life have I been able to say that I had enjoyed an event completely, because always something happens… correction, something REALLY happens… My sweet sixteen was not so sweet, my high school graduation was about making my mother socially happy while she took pictures of everyone but me… WTF… my college graduations went by with only Groundel as witness… and now my wedding went by being dismissed as a common nothing, being forgotten as well…

Celebrations were not meant to be in my pedigree… or in my life, period. I am all about making them, but not being celebrated… In a way that is sad… and it bites. But whatever… I do make lemonade with the lemons I get from family and those close that should know better… Everyone has better things to do. I have always been unimportant when it really comes to being taken into account for anything besides painting murals and decorating... What about LIFE? Seems a phone call really hurts the fingers and speaking handicaps the brain… Sometimes it feels I am the only dumb-ass who still likes celebrating people because of who they are, because they are so special for me… Not even once has anyone returned that favor. In 34 years. So… I am lucky I love lemonade. Got jars to spare.

And that's it for today's whining... Back to the Days of My Sucky Life...

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