Friday. Beginning of July. Feeling completely mad. Days are passing way too fast for my own taste, my lack of sleep is leaving me with too many mind blanks, and circunstances are disturbing and sucky. I am drained, tired, jaded, fed up, hopeless, zombifyed... I wish he would stop the nonsense and would just go back and face things as he should, not just running away. The easy way out is never the right way out... He is letting days pass in a way that will hurt us forever. And I am suppossed to keep belief in friendship and hope and the like... I've got no illusions left within me. And hope can only be kept with faith and belief... A no-win situation, perhaps... I wish things would not have gone this far, especially thanks to a random event that had no deep meaning. Stubburnness, false freedom, lack of insight... it will only lead us to our doom. But he doesn't see that. He doesn't even think that. Death is inminent.

If I had wings I would go to the lands where Earthmother would nurture me and grant me the warmth of her open arms... If I could breathe fire I would burn all enemies once and for all. If I had the power to wish, I would wish for love. But fantasy and reality are such different things!

Hollow... Empty... A void of dreams and will and thoughts and shades... How I miss the bliss of your presence... the certainty... the strenght... Running in circles is the worst fate that any being can have... And so a pathway towards eternity is spoiled...

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